Nan Goldin

October 20, 2021

Nan Goldin

By: Connor Albaugh

As we transition from a “color and light” designated unit of photography, we now focus our attention to the unit of “self portraiture.” The presentation of this idea of photography was very consuming and visually interesting. One thing that caught my eye through this lecture about this topic happened to be the diversity of artists and how different self portraits displayed different messages, emotions, and detail. Most notably, one of these photographers stood out from the rest and was able to tell stories through her pictures. This happened to be “Nan Goldin.” Having being giving the gift of life, her origins began as she was born in Washington, DC in 1953 (Article 4). Her early life and childhood was filled with struggle, passion, and deep connections with her surroundings. As uncomfortable as some of her images can be to view, her self portraits of herself and the world around her make each of these images unique and creative. Being that she experienced and had the world by the seed of her pants so young, she was able to use her past to fuel her wonderful photography and relate to people on a more personal level.

Nan Goldin was far more mature and ahead of most of the kids in her time. She found herself immersed in politics, marching in civil rights, and endured the suicide of her sister (Article 1). For one to experience this during your childhood can have a huge effect on someone mentally and physically. Not many kids her age at the time could have said they participated in such big events. Instead of doing nothing with her life and undertaking a sad lifestyle, she let her sister and her struggle with life and its curveballs consume her and associated herself with those who aren’t as comfortable with society (Article 1). Additionally, she also had to deal with the challenge of foster care at the age of 13 (Article 1). Enduring challenge upon challenge, she found photography and a Polaroid camera in the soles of her hands during her time at “Satya Community School” (Article 1). The opportunity to carry a camera gave her a way of “documenting her life” and the things she experienced to show “her everyday existence” (Article 1). With the help of the aspiring photographer David Armstrong and her aspiration for photography, she took her talents and furthered her interested at “Boston’s School of the Museum of Fine Arts” (Article 1). From a few pictures, it stemmed collections such as “the Boston school” and she was inspired by many other photographers. This passion of photography for Nan turned into an addiction and later a career. The people she photographed in her images were often people she knew and happened to be friends. But, unlike the other photographers in this time, her images conveyed strong emotion and there was insightful meaning tied to them. This is seen in the image where Nan is in bed next to Brian in bed in NYC in 1983 (Article 1). With two of these characters separated, the yellow color of the light in the image, and the facial expressions show tension and allow for the viewer to develop a sense of understanding to the situation. The angle is also important here because without Nan or Brian, it would be incomplete and the viewer would be short of a character to develop a sound idea for what the photo conveys. As this shows this photo was taken in NYC, Nan did move here in hopes of expanding her photography realm. It gave her a different perspective and gave her more of an opportunity to showcase her work. This was seen in her later published photo book ‘The Balad of Sexual Dependency’ which show Nan’s high points in life at parties to low points in life such as substance abuse, violence, and epidemics. All of these different pictures paint an idea of the life Nan experiences and deals with on a daily basis. With Nan being able to have a lot of practice with different peoples, areas, and events, these all helped to shape her photographic style.

Nan’s photographic style is very simple, yet physically attractive. She is famously known for “her deeply personal and candid portraiture” (Article 4). Now, many people think that the story behind Nan and her upbringing may distract someone from understanding her style of photography. However, I think it is very important to understand where she came from and how she was influenced to do certain things with her images. People may simply take images for fun and as a hobby. But, when you see some of the images that Nan takes and has taken, you can tell that she takes each and every image with a purpose. One of the things one may discern from her images is it allows one to get closer to Nan in the sense that they show aspects of her personal life and the people that are in it. Photography for her is a way of keeping up with her life and allows her to savor moments she has. Depending on the type of photographs she takes and how many she is able to take, it also shows the viewer moments she may miss without certain actors. Additionally, the photographs Nan takes allows one to piece together a story. Moments in ones life may be seen through baby pictures associated with growing up, for example. This is something Nan does in her photography because she feels she can express herself in the strongest way possible. It serves as a way to see what one has gone through, accomplished, or even failed at. What a perfect example because Nan experienced different households and political events which are two things she could have photographed to show her life and what was going on. These images are a way of “reflection” where one can see prints that cannot be altered and can serve as a trip down memory lane in some cases. In a sense, her images depict uncomfortable realties many people may not want to visit because of pain, sorrow, or certain emotions that may overcome them. Fortunately for Nan, she is an expert at bringing out these “challenging topics” in her art. With this all being said, one of the images that shows her photographic style happens to be the ‘self portrait in the mirror’ taken in 1980 in London which is seen at the top of this blog (Article 2). This photo shows Nan in a mirror in her bathroom which happens to be on the wall which surrounds the shower and bathing area. The angle at which this photo is taken forces you to look at Nan and her body shape in the mirror. Seeing yourself in the mirror shows your true and district physical features without being able to alter the true color and texture of certain areas. Now, as you enter your shower, you are naked because your goal here is to wash yourself and cleanse yourself from germs and other bacteria you may pick up in the outside world. Not only are you vulnerable in this case, but the vulnerable and open when you stand in front of a mirror because there is nothing to cover your body. She makes an uncomfortable feeling of something like her body and being free of clothing to making yourself feel comfortable and appreciate the features of your body the way they are. Everything in this image is close together ranging from the walls, the soap, and the mirror along with the leading lines towards the mirror. Nothing is more prominent than physical expression and viewing oneself before a true and pleasurable cleansing. The blue color emulates strong emotion, often translates to being sad or feeling a certain type of way. The lighting on her face in the mirror shoes her reflection instead of seeing her face in real view. But, the lighting helps to show the facial expressions on Nan’s face and brings out the color of her hair and shadows for where the light is unable to creep in. This bathroom isn’t really a well lit or bright room which is indicative of a place of great emotion, hitting close to home and unable to escape into other rooms or into the mounts of outsiders. A dark and vivid place for “self-reflection” serves to Nan as a place to contemplate life while maybe ridding oneself of things that may bring one stress and disappointment on a daily. I really like this image and how it was taken because there is so much to this then just it being a bathroom seen. The angle, the color, and framing of the image are all indicative of Nan’s style to convey her life and her thoughts in a way. It is also important for the viewer, such as I, to see where Nan is located and how of her body is shown. This is because she is unwilling to reveal certain parts, either for privacy purposes or to protect certain body parts she may be insecure about. It is also a place for uncertainty because it allows the viewer to come up with a way to view the image in the easiest way possible. Often times I see little portions of myself in the mirror and although there is more to show, it isn’t always needed or important to reveal yourself because you could be vulnerable which is uncomfortable. This image also relates to me on a physical and emotional level because I see a bathroom and eventually a shower as a place to contemplate life and block the outside world from your mind. Sometimes ten to fifteen minutes of water running down your brow allow one to relax and gather themselves which is what I think Nan Goldin is trying to achieve her. Although the shower is not on, seeing her body figure in the mirror is simple a way to express herself and her life in the form of a picture and can show hidden meanings that the normal human eye may not see at first sight.

With Nan Goldin being one of the most popular “self-portraiture” photographers, her impact on the field of photography is seen in multiple fashions. Her images display incredibly personal and important intimate relationships in her life which gives the viewer a sense of the people who mean the most and deserve a place in her artwork (Article 5). Not only does Nan do this, but she is able to show events and their emotions associated with them while also taking seeing certain perspectives and details normal people fail to pick up on (Article 5). The fact that her images are completely unedited is very interesting and respectable because despite the things that happen in her life, there is nothing that she could do to change whatever happened. Therefore, the photo she takes is final is so much more pure and accurate then a photo that is altered to hide certain details and errors. It tells a viewer a lot about her character and how forthcoming she is willing to be with the emotions and details there are in each of her images. Her ability to do these things in such an easy fashion inspires me to really appreciate life and everything I am able to experience. Life is so short and what we are able to do in the time we are on this earth will determine how we are viewed, remembered, and respected when we perish. In terms of her photography, the angles, the color, and her depth of field inspire me to emulate these types of images. Although I wont be able to show the emotion she may have because of the different lives we live, it gives me a starting point for self portraits I will take in the future. I want my images to be natural and tell the viewers a lot about my life. My experience with photography is equal to her first times with a camera before going off to university, but I want to do a lot more with the camera I have and what I am able to convey to the people who view my images certain emotion and experiences I have been lucky to be apart of in the short time I have been on this earth. With so much passion, drive, and constant repetition in her images, Nan Goldin is a true patron in the “self portraiture” portion of photography and has a legacy that will be looked upon and admired in generations to come.